Dear Anyone

Sometimes Dear Anyone,
Is the deepest call from your heart.
From the core of your cries it’s deafening,
Anyone. Just anyone. Can Anyone be there?
To feel my pain and comfort the cries?
Sometimes Dear Anyone,
Is the shrillist cry from your heart.
From the syncipated beating of your veins,
Anyone, Just anyone, Can anyone hear my call?
To sooth my horrors and comfort my pains?
Sometimes Dear Anyone,
Is the last resort from your fingers as they fly
Across your keyboards in the guise of “any chance you’re free?”
Anyone. Dear God. Please. Anyone.
Can you call back to me?

Shadow

When the message comes from the shadow
From the antithesis, from your fear,
How do you respond?
How do you fight the tears?

When they’ve taken your voice and your hope
By ignoring the plea and your tears
How do you respond?
And hide your fear?

When they ignored your statement of “no”
By taking what they felt they were owed
How do you respond?
To the shadow gripping your soul?
When they know you were in their control
And you were too scared, you couldn’t just go
How do you respond?

To the shadow that saw ‘yes’ in ‘no’?
When the shadow imposes on your future
When you thought they were in your past
How do you respond?
Was ‘moving on’ too good to last?

When the shadow takes over your mind
The shadow haunts your every breath
How do you respond?
When your predator sends you a text?

When your shadow refuses to hide,
And you’re tearing your heart up inside,
How do you respond
When you have hidden this part of your life?
So this shadow, this vulture, this ghost,
Who you trusted, when you were vulnerable and lost
How do you respond?
When you are fully aware of the cost?

Fear.
Hope.
Loss.

No.

I said no. You chose yes.

And my shadow,
Puts me to the test.

Drifting

Sometimes it’s the small things
The beat
The moment
The suspension of attention
When a screen is more interesting than you
When the laugh is somehow disconnected
The look is skips a beat and no longer lingers
When the fondness is still there but distracted
And those small things
Combined with a name
A glance at the wrong moment
Hold your breath
Feel the kiss
And then the truth

Continue reading “Drifting”

Out of reach

There’s a moment
In this turbulence
The trepidation as I step up to the crossroads
Where I realise
There’s a disturbance
The fear holds my heart steadfast as it implodes
In that moment
I realise, as my heart splits
There’s this void in myself that can’t be made complete
I’m still in love with you, despite it all
But I simply want to live
Is it too much to ask
Of my heart
To ask of you
Without falling further
Without falling apart

The life I have.

Not on the edge of what’s out of reach

Crash

Hitting reality with a crash

When I’m reminded how you don’t want me 

After a week of chatter from over seas

Your hot-and-cold returns, my heart re-breaks and my hopes flee 

Thanks for the hope

And thanks for the intoxicating charm

And thanks for the cold hard truth

As the floor falls away, I’m suddenly disarmed