My Christmas Present

Merry Christmas folks. Here’s a new poem which is very close to my heart about accepting your here and now at a time where you’re expected to fit in with the clichés and expectations of others. Realising that you can enjoy the now and still remember those you have sadly lost.  


When the family gathers and the smiles start flowing

With the cold crisp air all eyes are glowing
When the air seems filled with festive tunes

And laughter hangs in the decorated rooms

Like gossamer threads in the frosty morn

Starlight glistens, they burn brighter than before
Telling tales of the moments gone, the unforgotten days

Are handprints ghosted on surfaces, gifts and doorways
A cliché; I know, but it’s the small things I adore

At a time where we all notice and are more aware than before

Continue reading

My Christmas Present 

When the family gathers and the smiles start flowing
With the cold crisp air all eyes are glowing

When the air seems filled with festive tunes

And laughter hangs in the decorated rooms

Like gossamer threads in the frosty morn

Starlight glistens, they burn brighter than before
Telling tales of the moments gone, the unforgotten days

Are handprints ghosted on surfaces, gifts and doorways

A cliché; I know, but it’s the small things I adore

At a time where we all notice and are more aware than before

Moonlight shines, it seems to be lit stronger

Illuminates the smallest glance to make it last longer
I’m not at one with my loss, my heart breaks in a heartbeat

But this holiday without them can be bitter-sweet

It’s taken me years to accept those who can’t be here each year

But with those who I have I have with no need to fear

That’s what it means to me; what the festivities can give

Is everyone’s permission to take the time to just live
Having this time with my loved ones I love and cherish time more

And make the most of who I’m with now, not who I lost before

Moments are deceiving as time dances away, it’s okay

Kindness spreads like sun-kissed footsteps on a frozen day

Taking the time in its moment, not to forget, but push through

I can revel in misadventure… because I will have you
Sunlight bursts, dancing over everything

On days at home with you my heart’s full enough to sing

Because my rose-tinted world, my delight in small things

Is my gift to myself before the new year begins

The Shrew

A soliloquy for Katerina in Taming Of The Shrew; how she feels about her father’s lack of understanding & his devotion to her sister

Katerina:

O’he knows not how I need not to love,
How I need not no man to take my heart in his.
They lack the tact and empathetic sentiment
To truly care for or woo such a tender soul that of a woman,
Their hearts and minds are all but rough in their thinking,
looking to prove and impress, to compete and to win
They fight and duel for love, they do not relish and enjoy it.
I will enjoy, I will relish, I will exploit my empathetic soul
And I will fight to meet my match, may no man derive any other means
Nor challenge me, for though I love like a woman
I can fight like a man for that love.
My bitterness is but a veil to infuriate the subjective nature of my father’s love,
He, above all men, proves that beauty is more to a man than spirit,
My spirit is as much-mellow as he desires but shall not appear so
Until one worthy of such vulnerability is near to my heart.
My father loves my sister for her simplicity, her beauty and her flirtatious manner,
She draws in money, attention and bewilderments
Which can only benefit him and his purpose,
I on the other hand… disappoint. But soft, here comes my sister.

Reflections

A monologue; one of a Grand Guignol style production ‘Cabaret of Confessions’

Imagine this… to begin… Arson. Murder. Destruction. A child. Alone.
The empty shell of her home reflected in the tears in her eyes, we watch as they fall. The smell, the dry smell of the cinders as they dissolve into ash around her. Choking her… as she crouches. Half lit by the remaining flames. Flickering.
She reaches to her mother. Her body barely visible through the half-lit smoke. Motionless. The child fumbles forwards, hugging the corpse. Rocking. Sobbing. Her sister’s body lies near by, her father is no where to be seen.
Suddenly a near by mirror smashes in the heat… sending glass flying towards her. She screams in pain. We see her scream in pain… but her screams are silenced… drowned even, by the remaining flames as they destroy what is left.

Continue reading

A goodbye, broken

A free-written poem about a journey through a final goodbye to a loved one, as part of a Grand Guignol suite of monologues in poetic and free verse ‘Cabaret of Confessions’
Published on Spillwords in 2016

As she gazes into her eyes can she see the pain,
Will she see the shadows, will she see the shame,
She can see the love, she can see the light,
She can feel the pull, feel her chest coiled tight,
She hopes her heart won’t break as she tears away,
Will she hear it crack and feel her fingertips stray,
As they grasp onto the moment that’s no longer real
As they clutch for hands that can no longer feel.

Lost reaches — brush nothing, her heart begins to flake
Her soul hopes for sleep and the longing lays awake.
Would she really be missed, her mind starts to break
To feel like she belongs, what would it take…

Love like thunder, as light and as fickle as the promises now unspoken.

Continue reading